I just found out that most of my family members over the age of 50 have to deal with GERD - gastroesophageal reflux disease - and they all find it very uncomfortable and not much to be done about it aside from avoiding trigger foods. GERD mainly arises from putting too many of the wrong things in your mouth, so making smart choices now is the best prevention plan.

The sphincter between your esophagus and your stomach is supposed to regulate the flow of food. When it is in top-notch working condition, it lets food into the stomach but not back up. Unless you had a bad burrito or partied too hard last night. However, caffeine, alcohol, fried and fatty foods, tobacco, chocolate (so, you know, basically whatever vice you have, your sphincter gets off on it too) cause the sphincter to relax. Over time, this effect builds up and the sphincter becomes permanently weakened. Then every time you have a trigger food or drink, you will experience stomach acid and bile flowing back up into your esophagus. Eating a large meal and eating just before bed also place pressure on the sphincter and cause it to weaken. I should also mention that citrus and tomato products are known to cause heartburn, but since they have nutritional benefits, I would revert to the moderation rule.

[Ok, I can't find any good pictures that aren't copyrighted, but if you google 'esophageal sphincter' you will see a lot more than you thought you wanted!]

Most often, heartburn, a burning sensation in the chest and abdomen, will be the primary symptom. If you have difficulty swallowing, a lump in the throat, coughing, a dry mouth, or the taste of acid in your mouth, it would be a good idea to see a doctor. Because.....

GERD doesn't just cause discomfort. Acid has a bad reputation for a reason: it burns the s#$t out of things. Cool in science class. Not so cool when it's your esophagus. If you are constantly experiencing heartburn, the stomach acid is burning and damaging your esophagus, making it uncomfortable to swallow and either thinning the wall, or in some cases, burning a whole right through it. You will be in pain. You may bleed. You may begin to develop cancer (not as common. But your doctor will recommend regular endoscopy exams, and it probably won't be a ballgame to have a little camera down your throat on a regular basis).

Initial treatment involves taking antacids, to neutralize the stomach acid. Tums are good, and they'll give you a calcium boost as well. Unfortunately, overuse of these can cause constipation and diarrhea. There are also over-the-counter medications that can either reduce or block acid production. They take longer to be effective, so it is a good idea to take them before a meal if you know that you will be eating trigger foods. Pepcid AC and Prevacid 24 HR are good starting points when shopping for these. If you are experiencing symptoms >2-3 times a week, a doctor will be able to prescibe stronger things for you. Surgery is also an option, but it is not a cure.

If you can, neutralizing your diet will be gentler on your digestive system.

Hands down best blog post I've ever read. Yes, it is yoga-related but aside from the fact that it's a Hindu goddess, the story is something everyone can relate to. Mumford and Sons said it too - "I find strength in pain." It's life's greatest irony! In the long run, the worst things that happened to me are the best because they opened the most doors to welcome in new and better things.

I recently read someone's opinion that when a person gives you a book to read, they are asking you to look into their soul. I think it's the other way around - they are looking into your soul! I'm sure there is really a lot of both going on, depending on the people involved, the circumstances, and the book. Soooo that means that recommending books to read to one another is really an exchange on a whole other level. It's not just about a way to pass the time. It's a way to share the human condition.

Now is a great time to give this a go! Gift giving is rampant, people are off work or school, spending time indoors. Ask your friends for a book; they'll probably ask you for one. Just the other day my friend and I were talking about childhood books and found we shared a secret love for the same random tale...maybe you'll find that friendship goes a lot deeper than you thought...

And to all, a good night!

Smile as much as you gosh darn possibly can! Frowns are expensive for your body - not only do they use more muscles, but they generate stress, negative energy towards others, and then require more energy to reverse all of those things! When I see other people frown, I get more anxious just being around them.

Here's my rule of thumb (and yes, I do actually think before frowning...most of the time;)
How bad is this? Will I still be alive and not even changed that much from now? (Usually this answer is yes!) Then I choose not to frown.

Smile a little smile for me....

That was your crash course in muscles.

Muscles are the larger, fleshier part, red in the diagram. They are responsible for actual movement; this is where the impulse receptors are that lead to the firing and contraction. Muscles can change size, grow and shrink, become stronger or weaker. Tendons attach the muscles to the bones, and are not capable of changes in size. You are born with either shorter or longer tendons, which contributes to your ability to put on muscles mass. If your tendons are taking up the majority of the space, you will not be able to build as big of muscles. If your muscles are taking up most of the space, they have a lot of room to be able to grow. Tendons are 2% elastin, so they have some stretch. They kind of work like a spring during powerful movements. Ligaments are not stretchy at all and you don't want to mess with those guys.

I chose to write about this today because I have some mild tendonitis behind my knee at the moment. Tendonitis is inflammation of the tendon, and is caused by overuse. There isn't much you can do it for it, except give it the standard RICE (rest, ice, compression, and elevation), and be more careful with your training to help prevent recurrence. Generally, tendonitis is a problem for people who do the same activities over and over. Two of the times I've gotten it were from too much of the same activity too quickly, and with bad form.

You have to listen to your body and know your weaknesses. For me, I've got some foot problems, so I have to be really careful about running distances. My feet place extra strain on my leg muscles, so making the same motion over and over in bad form is going to give me problems. I also need to make sure I warm up my muscles properly if they're going to endure more strain than expected. Each person is different, so tune in to your body, say good morning, and see how you two can work this out.

I also think there's an interesting metaphor here: tendonitis results from doing the same thing too many times, or many times with bad form. I think you would see a similar pattern in communication and human conditions. Just sayin'.

Photo belongs to A.D.A.M Medical Encylopedia

This is the last weekend before Hanukkah, the Winter Solstice, Christmas, and well, I guess there is one more weekend before Kwanzaa but it's close! Let's get out there and celebrate!! Shop, swill, and make merry.

TGIJF
(Thank goodness it's a jolly Friday!)


courtesy of awkward family photos

DIY Counseling

Introduction: I totally support counseling. Finding a safe space to be able to talk without judgment, know your thoughts are contained between you and that person, organize yourself, and just have time to let go, well, everyone could use that. I think my life would be a zillion times calmer and more thoughtful if I could do that every week.

Reality Check: Counseling is resource-intensive. We're always running out of time and money, that's the game of life. I've also heard the argument made that that's what friends are for - helping youout with your problems.

Solution! A Wise Friend of mine told me that she can get to the root of any of her problems by asking herself Why? three times. The rule here is that you have to be willing to ask the hard questions, because Why? #3 will make you face something you don't like about yourself or the life you're building around you. Those things don't typically change over night, so when you start asking the questions, make sure you're ready for a few deep breaths at the end and remind yourself that life is a marathon rollercoaster.

Even now, I wanted to share a real, personal example, and the answers to the hard questions were too embarrassing to put on the internet, where you can never take things back! Here's a loose example to get you started. And don't write about it on the internet :)

I'm upset that Acquaintance and I can't get along.

Why do we fight?
Because I can't be nice to them, they don't deserve it, they aren't nice to me, they will take advantage of me, etc

Why can't I be nice to them?
Because I'm afraid of being a doormat, of not standing up for myself, that nothing will change.

Why am I afraid of being a doormat or if nothing changes?
Because that threatens my self esteem and what others may think of me.

And wahoo, that's not where your self esteem should come from!

Easier said than done, folks.

I will admit that I have spent a decent amount of time ogling this handless headstand [sorry, don't have the copyright! But you'll see a lot of other cool things there too :)], including emailing my yoga teacher, making her demo it on two separate occasions, and declaring that I was watching pure magic, not yoga. In my average bumpkin effort to justify my inability to stand on my head without my hands, I made the argument that some head shapes were at an advantage over others. Which is true! What is also true is that bones are constantly reshaping themselves to acclimate to the usage of the body, so theoretically you could grow yourself a headstand-friendly head. If indeed that is something you wanted, I can't make any promises about the fit of hats or hairdos after construction.

A more practical application of this is strong bones that are not at high risk of fracture...bones are constantly depositing calcium and growing new bones from their insides out. Older calcium is released into the blood stream when the body is calcium deficient. It's an ebb and flow, your bones adjust their calcium reserves to maintain a steady level of calcium in the bloodstream. In this process of taking in new material and letting go of the old, they strengthen, weaken, or shape themselves to help you do what you're doing. Since you probably don't know what a strong femur looks like compared to a weak femur (and neither do I!) I'll use a more easily visible example. Bunions are a fairly common feature on feet, a bony process sticking out next to the big toe. No one is born with these - they grow themselves after some time. Common causes include high heels and flat feet, because both of those impede the foot's ability to balance. The foot is struggling, so the bones decide to do something about it and make life easier.



This is happening in all of your bones, all the time, you just can't see it. Any kind of weight-bearing exercise )running, weight-lifting, push-ups, etc.) will force your bones to make themselves stronger. And then they are less likely to break! Usually this isn't a huge concern until later life, but certainly good to know!

Grrr!!! I heard the most frustrating thing in the news today. It said that schools were going to bring back soda and candy bars to the vending machines because kids weren't buying the milk, juice, and granola bars they put there in order to help fight childhood obesity. WHAT?!? Did someone really think they were helping kids make healthier lifestyle choices by choosing those foods over candy? Milk is cow's juice and not natural for the human body. It is not the worst thing you could put in your body, but it does not readily supply anything your body needs and instead plays a mean trick on your digestive system. Your body stopped producing the enzymes to process milk when you stopped needing to nurse from your mother. It can indeed continue to produce them, but it does not do so regularly and you can start up a nasty digestive problem if you are not prepared. Some people say that milk is a protein source, but it is a fairly negligible amount of protein compared to other things. You are being greatly deceived if you have consumed a bowl of cereal and thought you got enough protein for a meal. In reality, your protein : carbohydrates ratio is way out of whack in that meal and your muscles and brain will be running off the flour and sugar from the cereal instead of the protein they want. There is also a strong campaign that dairy provides calcium, and no one gets enough calcium. Broccoli and spinach provide more calcium than milk, and they don't give you the shits. Not to mention that most milk has its calcium and vitamin D added to it, it's not there naturally. Fruit juice equals sugar sans fiber. Eating a whole piece of fruit is good because you get all that crunchy fiber that helps you digest food at a pace your body can work with. Simply squeezing out the juice maximizes your calorie and sugar intake, and now at a rapid pace! Yes, it's good for vitamin C among other things, but that vitamin C is still present in the whole fruit that actually makes you feel full. All of this is assuming the juice being provided is 100% juice, not a juice cocktail, which are usually cheaper and more common.

Here is the nutritional information for a bottle of apple-banana juice, something I would definitely expect kids to drink. Notice that the serving size is 4 fl oz. This is what a wine pour at a restaurant is supposed to be, and I know we all complain about how tiny those are! In this tiny serving there are several calories, a decent amount of carbs and sugar, negligible amounts of anything else, although I will give credit for plenty of vitamin C. However, aside from the vitamin C, what is this product offering you? Nada.

The last choice being offered, granola bars, is simply an energy spike. It gained its reputation for being healthy because people engaged in long bouts of physical exercise would eat them. Protein takes awhile to be incorporated into the body, so if you have completely run out of energy, you need to eat a combo of protein for later and quick carbohydrates for now. If you are sitting in class and only moving your hand to write things down or pass notes to your neighbor, you don't need the quick carbohydrates, you need an energy source that is slower and more stable so you can pay attention without talking too much in class.

Dear schools, please think about what you are actually doing, not because the "Got Milk?" marketing campaign told you so.

Since I just wrote about control of external things, I have to share this quote! I'm reading The Alchemist, and the alchemist himself says that "anyone who interferes with the Personal Legend of another thing will never discover his own."

Continuing to break down the shoulder girdle...

We have the pectoralis major and minor muscles. Usually they're just referred to as your "pecs" and being that it's hard to isolate the two, that seems pretty reasonable. The pectoralis major is very large and fan-shaped, starting at the inner half of your clavicle, the sternum and the cartilage of the upper six ribs. It's pretty stable. It inserts into a groove on your humerus, so the major functions this muscle plays are in flexion (smaller angle) of your arm, bringing it in toward you, and rotating the arm toward you.




The pectoralis minor is much smaller and triangular-shaped. It sits just underneath the pectoralis major. It contracts in a different direction than the pec major, originating in the third, fourth, and fifth ribs and attaching to the coracoid process of your scapula. As the ribs do not move a lot, the pec minor serves to pull the point of the scapula downward and inward.

These muscles are extremely powerful!! They attach your arms to the front side of your body, so anything that you use your arms to move farther in front of you uses these muscles. Every time you pick up something. Muscles that get a lot of work also need to be stretched, or else they just get tight, painful and useless. Also, these muscles are in a very shortened position for most of the relaxed part of the day, particularly when you are on a computer. So now you REALLY need to stretch them.









There are a few ways you can go about this, and they're all pretty similar, but I suggest mixing it up to hit all the acute differences.

1) Stand in a doorframe and put your arms out at shoulder level. Hold on to the frame and lean forward.

2) Stand at a wall or lay facedown on the ground. Put one arm out either perpendicular to your body, or perpendicular with the elbow bent at a right angle. Then roll yourself away from the arm being stretched so your chest opens.

3) Stand and interlace your hands behind your back. Roll your shoulders back and reach your arms back as far as you can.

Lately I've been seeing the need to control all over the place. There are two types of control - there is control of the self, and control of the world around the self. The first type of control I admire, the second, I actually feel pity for. Bad, unfortunate things happen. It doesn't matter what you do, they will come. So when I see an overarching fear of these events, and absurd amounts of effort to protect oneself from them, I don't understand. All that results from that effort is that you've made yourself tired and unprepared to deal with the bad luck that will inevitably fall upon you. My apologies if this sounds harsh, because in reality I am quite the optimist and believe that bad eventually flows into even-better-than-before. However, I prefer to face my life head-on, and feel confident that I have the toolkit to deal with my challenges, and if I don't have that toolkit now, well than dammit I'm going to have that toolkit by the time this shit is over with! Make yourself feisty. No one messes with you. Set an example - don't go around pointing and poking and placing things where you think they should be so as not to bug you. Remember all that breathing stuff I wrote about, with your chest tall, and the humbleness of a warrior? Yeah, you probably forgot, but maybe now you'll use it.

The Seattle Freeze....being a Seattle native I think I've preferred to semi-deny its existence, but lately everyone seems to be mentioning it and every time I get embarrassed. In case you don't know, the Seattle Freeze is the idea that Seattlites are nice and polite, but have no real interest in actually being a friend or getting to know you. Umm, yeah, I guess I do notice this happen and have been bummed after meeting cool people and they have no interest in keeping the fun times going. Then this morning on the radio they mentioned a statistic that Seattle is one of the top two cities for number of single people. Gee, now I wonder why! So, I made a scientific discovery: Not being Friendly = Less Friends and Less Lovers. Fortunately, it's 100% obvious how to reverse that! Being Friendly - More Friends and More Lovers. [Maybe that doesn't appeal to you, that's ok, maybe you should move to the moon]. Friendliness, genuine friendliness, as in an interest in the other person's wellbeing and how their day is going, will only bring you more happiness. So easy!

Here is a great example of all this social mishmash: After a fun-run, some other people had shake weights, so my friend and I joined in the fun over a couple beers and there was a lot of laughter and shaking and it was really just a pretty fun time. We tried to exchange info with the shake weight owners, and they responded with a "who are you weirdos who want to hang out later" attitude. We never saw them again.

So shake on, Seattle. And other unfriendly people around the world!

Two days ago I attended a workshop about how to give physical adjustments in yoga. I'm not currently training to be a teacher, or any kind of professional in giving them, but as an avid receiver, I thought it would be really interesting to learn about what goes on in giving them. Going into it, I expected the teacher would point out various body parts, and how they can be positioned wrong and what it looks like when they are in proper alignment.

I got a whole lot more than that.

My daily life doesn't really require that I approach people without invitation and in a highly personal manner, so I don't usually think about what goes into that. During yoga practice, most people are in their own personal thoughts, and becoming aware of their body, and there is just a moment going on during the class. When a teacher comes up and touches you, and often it is somewhere you rarely get touched, say your tummy or your hips, we even got to the sternum and the sacrum, there is more than just physical contact going on. You enter someone's personal space, and there can be an exchange of energy there. And it's always different. Of course it's a given that every person is different, and their bodies are different, but I had never fully experienced this. Entering people's personal space has always been an isolated experience for me - when it happens it is not very often and never close together with different people. Throughout this class, I had the oppourtunity to adjust 10-12 different people. Your hands are on their body, they are trusting you, and then vice versa as I was being adjusted by them. The exchange of energy here was huge, and probably one of the best ways to really get to know yourself - what you are currently capable of and where you can go.

While I'm sure not everyone wants to sign up for a yoga workshop, I would definitely suggest opening yourself up to the human experience wherever possible, and seeing where it can take you. Any oppourtunity to get closer to people, in any setting, will reward and strengthen you.

I have been to a couple of short cancer survivorship panels, and the survivors are always very open about their experience. But you know, I don't think any amount of listening will ever get someone to a point where they can understand what a cancer patient is going through. Here is a short, imagery-laden perspective on  getting a cancer diagnosis.

“Cancer Winter”
By Marilyn Hacker

No body stops dreaming it’s twenty-five,

or twelve, or ten, when what is possible’s

a long road poplars curtain against loss, able

to swim the river, hike the culvert, drive

through the open portal, find the gold hive

dripping with liquid sweetness. Risible

fantasy, if, all the while, invisible

entropies block the roads, so you arrive

outside a ruin, where trees bald with blight

wane by a river drained to sluggish mud.

The setting sun looks terribly like blood.

The hovering swarm has nothing to forgive.

Your voice petitions the indifferent night:

“I don’t know how to die yet. Let me live.”

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Courtesy of The Yale UCL Medical Students Poetry Competition
Excerpted from “Winter Numbers: Poems by Marilyn Hacker” (c) 1994 by Marilyn Hacker. Used with permission of the publisher, W.W. Norton & Company, Inc.

And I found all of this on the NY Times Well Blog.



.

The trapezius. This one's a big boy, and can carry a lot of tension, so it really is helpful to be aware of what it is and what it does. For starters, its origin is the skull and spine. It starts at the back base of your skull, and rides all along your spine to just above the lumbar area. All of these fibers stretch across your back to insert into your scapula (information in my October section, haven't figured out how to link my posts yet - will do that soon!). So this one muscle connects your head, spine, and shoulder. You better be nice or it will f*$k you up! Heh. The primary functions of the trapezius are to support the arm and move the scapula around. The top part is used when you shrug your shoulders. The middle part is used when squeezing the shoulder blades together in the middle of the back. The lower part is used mostly for throwing, with some assistance from the deltoids. If you are so talented as to be able to keep you shoulder blades stable in one spot, then you can use your traps to move your spine and extend your neck. I just tried this and it was not so easy! When working together with some neighbors such as the rhomboids and serratus anterior, the trapezius can rotate the scapula (to lift your arms above your head) and bring it in towards the spine.

Last weekend I was watching football with my dad, and was commenting on the "delightful glow" in the face of the Seahawks coach. My dad (not usually one to comment on someone's emotional state) replied by saying how well known Pete Carroll is for his optimism.



Even when he's upset!



Then I noticed the coach of the other team -


(I tried to pick a good picture of him, not just one that would prove my point) You can just see more stress in his face. I barely know either of these gentlemen, but I can still see their dispositions show right through.

Remember what kind of face you want to show the world each day, because it will show you the same thing right back.

While perusing cooking classes this coming December, I noticed that 98% (ish) of them were for cookies and baking and chocolate and other things loaded with sugar! And this was a local, organic, co-op! How in the name of vegetarians is one supposed to stay healthy this holiday season with that kind of inspiration? I'm not saying you should give up treats during the holidays, but personally I crash and burn faster than a crappy paper airplane unless I get some protein and veggies in there too (trust me, I've tried ice cream for breakfast - as Ron Burgundy says, "milk was a bad choice"). So I think it's a good idea to get some tasty Paleo-style recipes in the mix too! If they are tasty enough, you'll look forward to those just as much as the carbo loads.
Here are a few that I found at Epicurious.com:

Kale & Smoked Bacon Salad with Zinfandel Vinaigrette

Sauteed Shredded Brussesl Sprouts with Smoked Ham & Toasted Pecans

Roasted Red Onions with Pomegranate, Orange & Parsley Gremolata

Green Beans with Toasted Walnuts & Dried Cherry Vinaigrette
I think this one sounds super yummy!

Lemon & Prosciutto-Stuffed Pork Loin Roast with Broccolini
Ok, this one sounds pretty damn good too.

Feta Walnut Date Cigars

Chanterelles (or Creminis) with Chestnuts & Pearl Onions

Beet & Tangerine Salad with Cranberry Dressing

Kale & Brussels Sprouts Salad
Yes, it's very green. Get over it. It's good for you.

Savory Pumpkin Pie Soup with Cinnamon Marshmallows, Pepitas Streusel, & Whipped Creme Fraiche
eeee...go a little easy on the toppings, maybe just one or two of them. Lots of fat and sugar, no bueno. But cinnamon marshmallows!!! YUM!!

Recently I found out a friend of mine lost their mother to Lou Gehrig's disease, or Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis (ALS). She died within a year of diagnosis, and there is no cure. The best hope is a drug that will extend the time where quality of life is still high by a few months.

ALS [if you're interested in the breakdown of the language - "a" = no, "myo" = muscle, "trophic" = nourishment, "lateral" refers to the location of the deterioration, and "sclerosis"  = hardening, i.e., scar tissue] is a disease of the nervous system. In a fully functioning system, the brain sends messages down the spinal cord. When the messages have reached the place where they branch out into the body, they follow long nerves until the message has reached the muscle. At this junction, there is a motor neuron that transmits the message into the muscle. In Lou Gehrig's disease, this motor neuron degenerates. Because the neuron is not sending full messages to the muscles, the muscles begin to weaken until there is almost nothing left. There are voluntary and involuntary muscles in the human body, and ALS only affects the voluntary ones - moving your arms, walking, breathing. Your stomach and heart will still continue to function.
Muscle weakness and twitching are the first symptoms to be seen. They can worsen and speech may be impaired too, but it is impossible to accurately diagnose ALS without specific tests done by a physician. Most of the time ALS strikes in people ages 40 - 70, but it can occur in younger people as well. Only 10% of cases have genetic links; the rest are sporadic and there is no known cause. Expected lifespan is 2-3 years, but can be much longer or much shorter.

There are many days of the year to give thanks, not just one.

Last weekend I went to an event and they were raffling off prizes, which included a 3-month, 6-month, and 1-year membership to one of my favorite yoga studios. I wanted it SO BADLY. I was thinking how much it would change my life - maybe I would move near the studio, I'm pretty sure I'd be ready for teacher training by the end of the year, all the new people I'd meet and things I would try. Then they brought up the gal who won the year membership last year. And - hopefully you can feel me getting a little snarly here - she said she hadn't wanted to go to the party, nor did she even like yoga. She got dragged by a friend and then won. I was so bitter when I first heard that. How could the world give someone so ungrateful and disinterested something I wanted so badly? As her story unraveled, she now frequents the studio several times a week, and is a huge yoga devotee. She needed that one-year membership to bring something new and wonderful in her life. I was able to find it through some other channel. This was really a moment where I remembered that sometimes other people need things more than me. It's always easy to get caught up in your own wishes and desires, but being happy when others have things you don't can still bring great peace of mind.

Whenever you can, work out with a friend! Or several friends! I rarely work out alone, and as a result, I rarely dread my workouts. This morning I did some weights with two other gals who have similar goals to me, and it was great. Plenty of conversation (have to work on keeping that to a limit!), two other sets of eyes to keep track of your form, and three people to inspire each other. These parameters made me look forward to a 6 am gym sesh on a Friday, believe it or not!

Note: Possible side effects of exercising with friends may include lots of laughter and alcoholic beverages. Why let the exercise endorphins end with the workout?

Today I went to the dentist and they had this nifty new contraption - it looked like a space age hair dryer with blue lights coming out of it. She was scanning my mouth with it, and it turns out, looking for evidence of oral cancer. Apparently this type of cancer is really hard to catch until it is advanced to the metastasis stage, so this is a great breakthrough in oral health. Another interesting tidbit there is that the demographics of oral cancer patients is changing - from older men who are smokers and boozers to younger women. There is some hypothesis about it being linked to HPV, the sexually transmitted human papilloma virus. Not sure how they will ever establish a link, given the Guardasil vaccine, but I'm hedging my bets against cancer regardless! Another good reason to go to the dentist. Mine is super friendly and has a great magazine selection along with her anti-cancer equipment so I would be happy to give you a recommendation!

If you are looking for a healthy little taste of the season (between egg nog, stuffing, and holiday cookies, that can be hard to come by!) I suggest peppermint! Its assistance in digestion and relaxation is a fantastic complement to all of the heavy foods you will be eating, and their best friend, the nap. Peppermint's active ingredient, menthol, relaxes your muscles. This is why the stuff you rub on your chest when you have a cold smells minty. It can be good for your respiratory system, as well as your digestive system. When you feel tight, full, or cramped in your stomach, a dose of peppermint will help clear that up. Peppermint tea is the easiest way to get it into your stomach. If you have anything going on in your head, chest, or skin, a peppermint cream will help. Peppermint capsules are available as well.

Now for the queen's recommendation...

Get your own plant! It's a beautiful flower and will remind you of all that it can do for you. You can buy one here. If you are ambitious and want to make your own peppermint tea, simply dry the leaves and steep them in hot water, approximately ten minutes. You can drink as much peppermint tea as you want, there's no such thing as an overdose! [This does not apply to other methods of peppermint intake].

If you are really not into herbs or a calm tummy, then I will point you in the direction of buying the plant for its festive flower and grabbing a Starbucks Skinny Peppermint Mocha. While it may not relax your tummy, it will bring a smile to your face at a few less calories than the original.

Notes on Peppermint: Do not take if you have GERD (gastroesophageal reflux disease) as peppermint will further inhibit the use of your sphincter and make you much more uncomfortable and possibly increase your risk of cancer. For you, the Starbucks option may be your better choice.

If you are patient in one moment of anger, you will escape a hundred days of sorrow. - Chinese Proverb

 Now we have talked about all the shoulder bones. The point that I wanted to make overall was that raising your arms above your head in a useful manner is more technical than you might have imagined. Sure, you can lift them up right now, no problem. You can grab things off the top shelf. Small potatoes, people. If you want to use your arms for any activities that require real strength or stability, you need to know what you're doing (if you are totally happy with your computer life and bad posture and have no foreseeable future doing anything else, you can skip this post). Work with me here - the image here is of your right shoulder girdle. Imagine you wanted to lift your right arm. The humerus there will rotate out towards us, applying pressure backwards. Your clavicle does not have a mind of its own, so ignore that for now. The scapula, however, can sit wherever it likes. Look at that acromioclavicular point - the acromion - and now you might see that it could get in the way of the humerus' freedom to full extend. If the humerus cannot fully extend, it can neither maintain its stability, nor bear large amounts of weight. Think about trying to stand on one of your legs if you couldn't strengthen it and had to tilt all your weight off to the side. Reverse scenario: the scapula slides closer to the spine and down towards the pelvis. OUT OF THE WAY. Now the humerus is free to straighten out, and it can use the scapula for support, at the same time! Essentially you've gotten your leg in a straight line, your pelvis lined right on top of it, and you could hang here for hours.

Good posture will do you wonders. Straight spine. Shoulders back and down. Inhale and fill up your chest with air. Conquer the world.

This upcoming weekend is the Pineapple Classic, a 5k adventure obstacle awesome course to benefit lymphoma and leukemia. A muddy, slip-n-slide good time.

Leukemia is a little more widely understood, but personally, I've always been a little hazy when it comes to the details on lymphoma. Lymph nodes are small, roundish organs of the immune system, which you can find all over your body. You've probably had issues with them during ear, nose or throat infections. They house a variety of immune cells, including B and T cells. While your lymph nodes can become large and inflamed for all sorts of reasons, and all sorts of cancer, when they start to create the malignant cells and grow a solid tumor, that is when you have lymphoma. There are over 70 types of lymphomas, so maybe we'll get into that later.

Typical symptoms include fever, fatigue, weight loss, coughing and chest pain, swollen lymph nodes, unusual feelings in your abdomen, and soaking night sweats...hmm kind of sounds like the flu except you don't have the flu. Seems to make sense for a cancer in your immune system! And since you shouldn't go asking your doctor if you have cancer every time you want to take a nap, it's important to be listening to your body so that you can recognize a common cold and something more serious.

Treatment can vary, depending on the degree of the disease. Sometimes you just wait and see what happens, other times you can get radiation or chemotherapy, all the way up to a stem cell transplant if recurrences occur (hey! this is a good time to get on the bone marrow registry!).

Now back to pineapples and mudpits!

Mmmm, persimmons for breakfast. They are the perfect fall flavor.

Today:
Mid-morning interaction with an individual whom I needed help from. Something had come up, which I could not have predicted, he admitted I would not have been able to know about it ahead of time, and he single-handedly could have made things easy for me or really difficult. He chose the latter, and I was kind of worked up and frazzled about it - now I have to inconvenience someone else, be out of the office for a decent amount of time, and spend extra money, all because I encountered someone who was a bad listener and couldn't think for himself.

However, smiles were coming my way, because the aforementioned person to be inconvenienced was a dream come true. He was easy-going, polite, helpful, and patient. I was still upset and having trouble paying for the little parking tickets and he didn't blink an eye or treat me like the dummy I was acting to be. By the end of this interaction, I felt relaxed, calm, and not really worried about it.

My point here is that whenever you can be the easy-going, polite, helpful, and patient person, you just may be turning someone's day around. Someone just did that for me, so maybe tomorrow I will do it for someone else.

FTR: This was not a date.

Today I was feeling uninspired to write anything, just sort of lazy I suppose! It kind of bugged me that I felt that way, then I decided to let go and not do it if I didn't feel like it. That felt much better - then all of a sudden I decided to share that feeling, and now had something to write about! A lot of times it can be smart to let go and see how things unfold.

Seattle International Comedy Competition!

Yahoo for laughing! For almost every night of the week from now thru November 27, you can watch some of comedy's best live acts. Shows are all over Washington so you shouldn't have to drive too far...which probably works out so you can have a bevvie or two and make it home safe.

Check it out:
http://seattlecomedycompetition.com/

Now that we have discussed the three bones making up the shoulder girdle, you should be able to have a better visualization of what's going on in there. All three of these bones can easily be felt and seen, so it's easy to monitor their movement. When you are are feeling crummy and defeated (anywhere, though this can happen predominantly when seated), it helps to notice where your shoulder bones are, and where they should be. I almost 100% recognize that when I am feeling low or unbalanced, my scapulas have slid up my back, my clavicles collapse in, and my humerus is at attention. If I take the time roll them all out tall and proud, I instantaneously feel stronger. This can also be accomplished by taking big warrior breaths, where you inhale a substantial amound of air, and fill your chest so it rises. When it rises, it almost forces the bones back, and when the bones are rolled back, the chest is open and strong. If you do these things, you will also feel your spine straighten. Hmm, yeah, don't know anyone who doesn't like a straight spine!

Please don't give up on me, I'm working it out.

When the days starting getting darker, shorter, colder, and a lot less like the tropical island I wish I lived on, I try to remember something in particular to look forward to every day. For example, it's less than two months until the darkest day of the year, and then we're on our way out! No, just kidding, that is a bad example. Pretty much anything that involves counting it yourself can be a bad idea.

So when a day pops up where there is nothing on the looking-forward-to-it agenda, I can see it coming in the morning and force a good thing into the day! Although, as I'm thinking this through, I actually prefer to have a very good thing every few hours...even better, says the healthy hedonist.

Some things rolling around my life that are making me smile:

Attempting to make fried rice tonight
Attempting to put soy egg nog in my coffee (that one was actually a failure because it was too thin but I smiled at myself for thinking soy nog was a good idea)
Favorite yoga classes (where else can you lay down in 85 degree temperatures for 90 minutes for the next 8 months? Plus there's a few other things I like)
Finding friends to drink wine with
Going for a run before work and deciding that it was too dark to be safe, thus ridding myself of guilt for skipping out on early runs for the rest of the dark season
Thinking about New Year's Eve mischief
Doing absolutely nothing after work besides taking a bath and watching a movie
Putting cinnamon on everything
Finding favorite winter clothes from the back of my closet
Reading other people's vivaciously interesting blogs
Holiday parties
More holiday parties
More sleep because it's darker!
Little kids rolling around in jackets that are too big for them
Playing rockband

And a warm winter to all!

The last part of your shoulder girdle is the humerus (Want to hear a joke about an arm? No. Oh, but it's humerus! Yes, I do indeed enjoy bad jokes), the big solid bone in your upper arm. Tickets to the gun show? The humerus has got 'em. The round head of the humerus articulates with the glenoid fossa on the scapula, mostly held together by tendons - which is why it is so easy to dislocate your shoulder, but you rarely hear about a dislocated hip in the non-geriatric population. Taking a look at all of these tuberosity (more or less a protrusion of bone, something for muscles to hang on to) things we have going on, the infraspinatous and teres minor insert on the greater tuberosity, working to externally rotate the arm. By the way, this is the front view of a left humerus. Just in case you couldn't feel your own trochlea to figure it out...wink. The lesser tuberosity hangs on to the subscapularis muscle and coordinates the internal rotation of the arm.  Then in the groove between the greater and lesser tubercles, the pectoralis major, latissimus dorsi, and teres major attach to contribute to the internal rotation of the arm. One last one! The deltoid muscles gets its very own tuberosity, farther down on the arm. It helps lift your arm up and out laterally.

 

Ok, how about another bad joke to balance out all that terminology? I learned this one in chemistry class. What do we do with people that are sick? We Helium. What if we can't heal them? We Barium.

According to the World Health Organization, lung cancer causes more deaths than any other cancer - about 50% more than the second most deadly cancer. We have two things to thank for this: the first being the obvious tobacco, and the second being the lack of a reliable test for early detection [this is a good time to remind yourself to get screened for other types of cancer, ones we DO have reliable screening tests!]. Exciting news here at work!! Scientists have discovered protein biomarkers in mice that identify the growing lung cancer, and have been able to match these up with human proteins. There is not enough data yet to actually create the blood test, but it is looking like a very real possibility in the very near future. In the meantime, have a piece of gum.

Recently I signed up to join the bone marrow registry. Everyone's immediate reaction is, "That's so painful!" It is possible that they are right. However, there are a few things wrong with that argument: 1) It is not as painful as having cancer. 2) There is a new procedure where you do not have to have bone marrow taken out of the base of your spine. This new procedure involves taking a medication to hop up your blood stem cell count, then they take blood out of one arm, extract the stem cells, and put your blood back into your other arm. It can take 1-2 days, and possibly cause some flu-like symptoms, but most people recover within a day or two of donating. The spinal tap procedure does still exist (the bone marrow actually comes out of the back of your pelvis) but the website claims it's painless. The doctor will determine which procedure will be most appropriate. And to sign up all you have to do is swab some tissue off of your cheek. I did it at my desk while I was at work it's so simple.

Voila, you just saved a life.


http://www.getswabbed.org/

The average American eats 24 pounds of candy every year (Nielsen Research). Holy smokes that's a lot of candy. Maybe you eat less than that so you don't have to feel too guilty right now. Regardless, that is a lot of sugar out there. (Oh PS - Happy Halloween ;). And unless you have some kind of ungodly willpower, you might be like me and have some Halloween treats. Which is cool aside from the spike in your blood sugar and insulin, and the fatigue and crabbiness that can come with that. Counting the candy as a sunk cost of having a good time during a holiday, try to regulate your blood sugar by eating mostly low glycemic foods today! For breakfast, scrambled eggs with salsa or tomatoes, and your beverage of choice - sans sugar - and try a salad with little or no salad dressing for lunch. Put whatever you want on it! Dinner pick some yummy meat, steak or salmon, and veggies, like a seasonal organic squash would be tasty. Then you won't be grumpy because it's Monday and grumpy because you ate too much sugar!



Who actually eats candy corn anymore? Maybe a bad photo choice?

"The humbleness of a warrior is not the humbleness of a beggar. The warrior lowers his head to no one, but at the same time he doesn't permit anyone to lower his head to him. The beggar, on the other hand, falls to his knees at the drop of a hat and scrapes the floor at anyone he deems to be higher; but at the same time, he demands that someone lower than him scrape the floor for him." - Carlos Casteneda



Asserting a hierarchy is the same as asserting low self-esteem. You can stand tall and strong without defining your relationships to those around you.

Wine is one of the most important food groups.

I'll stand behind that.

Tonight I am off to volunteer in support of my good friend, and also a fistful of women with stage IV breast cancer! There are so many beautiful things going on tonight, I don't even know where to begin. The event is primarily an auction, both silent and live, offering up all kinds of goodies and services for brides-to-be. Maybe something for the groom too. But he's more low maintenance so we're not too worried about that. Brooke and Jubal from the 92.5 morning show will be there (did you know Jubal has over 5000 Facebook friends and is not allowed to have any more? A limit on friends??), and there will be wine and gorgeous desserts, and givers of all types. The bottom line is that all money raised goes to grant a wish for a woman with stage IV breast cancer...makes my heart crumble to think about it.

http://www.gethitchedgivehope.com/

See you there!

"The healthiest thing I've ever heard of!"
I get the Full Circle Farm produce boxes every week, and it continues to provide me with new and sometimes yes, sometimes not, tasty vegetables. A recent one was celery root. WTF, mate. Is that even edible, you ask? Well, thanks to the gem of an iPhone app, Epicurious, I found a recipe for which I even had all the ingredients, and would provide me, a solo dweller, with food for several days. If you would like to get the exact details, consult Epicurious, it's their recipe. My instructions include sauteeing some carrots, onions, and the celery root (sounds very much like the mirepouix I have recently been introduced to! Tell your friends you are making them a fancy French meal!) and when those are golden delicious, add seasoning, beef broth and lentils. I even had my own soup bone so my broth was au naturale. You can see the glow in my skin as a result of this. I purchased already-cooked lentils from Trader Joe's, so I didn't have to pay attention to making sure they were soft enough. But you should do that. Then when things are simmering well, add your kale! A meal is not complete without a fibrous leafy crunchy green vegetable. Every gastroenterologist will tell you that. And that's all folks. When I brought it to work today, I was rewarded with the above compliment. I know you're probably drooling at the mouth right now and probably on your way to Chipotle instead, but just thought I'd share something so healthy and fulfilling that you're entitled to your cheesecake afterwards.

I considered taking a photo, but it really doesn't do the dish justice, so how about a photo that shows you what it tastes like?

The acromion is the lateral extension of the spine of the scapula, and connects with the clavicle. It hangs over the meeting of the humerus and the scapula to provide protection. The coracoid process also helps to protect the shoulder join, and is an attachment for several muscles and ligaments, including your chest muscles and biceps. The glenoid cavity, along with the head of the humerus, form the ball-and-socket joint of your shoulder. Compared to other ball-and-socket joints in the body, this one is shallow - allowing for great mobility and great instability.

There are seveteen muscles that have origins or attachments on the scapula!! They're all working together simultaneously!! Wild!! We have the omohyoid, a few fibers of the latissimus dorsi, teres major and teres minor, infraspinatous and supraspinatous, deltoid, subscapularis, the long and short head of the biceps brachii, the long head of the triceps brachii, coracobrachialis, pectoralis minor, serratus anterior, rhomboid major and rhomboid minor, levator scapulae and trapezius.

Here we have the dorsal or backside view of the right scapula. The most prominent feature here is the spine of the scapula, which works with two major muscles. It is the origin, essentially the anchor, of the deltoid muscle, the primary muscle of the shoulder. It is also the insertion of your trapezius, so the scapula moves along with the trapezius muscle when you decide to shrug your shoulders. Above and below the spine of the scapula, we have two depressions, the supraspinous fossa and the infraspinous fossa. Both are origins for their sister muscles. The supraspinatous muscle attaches to the humerus, the arm bone, and helps you raise your arm laterally. The infraspinatous is much larger and helps you externally rotate your arm so your inside elbows face out. If you sit in a desk at a computer all day like me, this muscle gets virtually no action. But it is begging to go to the party. Along the lateral border you can see a little bit of shading marking a ridge, which helps to separate the infraspinatous from the teres major and teres minor muscles. The teres minor attaches to the small space between this ridge and the actual edge of the bone. On the small edge of the bone at the bottom, below the lateral border, is where the teres major attaches. Enough for now!

Last Friday night I watched Walk the Line, and simultaneously over the past week have listened to a new song on repeat, with the lyrics -
"I was June and you were my Johnny Cash,
Never one without the other, we made a pact."

Recognizing that Mr. Cash carried guilt for the untimely death of his brother, went on a 3-year-tour for the Vietnam War, a divorce, and a never-ending drug addiction, in total he obviously experienced a lot of pain, it is incredibly admirable that June and Johnny had a strong enough relationship to move past these things and eventually die within four months of each other. Technically the cause of death was complications from diabetes...

His problems lingered on for the rest of his life. He and June stayed together and worked together for 35 years. I think it's an overarching testament that being there for someone, being patient and being understanding are human qualities that trump all others.

The scapula, your shoulder blade, is a pretty darn awesome bone. There is just a lot going on here, as it supports your back and shoulder muscles, both of which are very large and powerful, along with the movement of your arm, which is a lot of movement. This is the front-side view of a left scapula, and you can see the acromion process where the clavicle articulates. The main feature on this side of the bone is the subscapular fossa (fossa means depression), which is home to the ridges you can see. These ridges serve as the attachments for many of the tendons in the shoulder girdle. At the top of the fossa, where the color changes from a lighter to darker color, is a deeper depression that increases the structural strength of the bone. The backside of this depression is where the spine of the scapula is...to be covered later!

The clavicle, aka collarbone, is easily palpated and looks quite nice on people with nice shoulders. Its primary significance is that it is the only skeletal contact for the shoulder blade and arm to the axial skeleton - the rest of the body. On the other end it connects to the top of the sternum where the ribs begin. It is strong and stiff, in order to hold them in place and away from the body. You want that so that you can have a maximum range of movement, you know, throw a baseball, reach the stuff on the top shelf. Which is also the reason it is the most commonly broken bone in the body [If you break your clavicle you must wear a tight sling for approximately 3 weeks to hold the bone in place. Otherwise your arm will drag the bone fragment down and you will be forever handicapped and disfigured. Yuck]. The outside end of the clavicle attaches to the acromion process of the scapula. Finally, the clavicle helps protect the nerves running out to the arm.

The above photo is the anterior view.

I don't know how to take a photo of myself, so you will have to tolerate this one of a stranger. But this is what I've looked like at my computer for years and years, basically the entire existence of the computer has enjoyed my bad posture. Not good for your spine, but more importantly is the slew of problems created around your shoulders, which are already the least stable join in your body. Take care of them, yo.





Yoga was what really opened my eyes to how awful my posture was, and how limiting it can be over an extended period of time and for doing anything other than typing. An ergonomics evaluation reinforced that. I even found that my shoulders are hunched for the majority of my time - sitting around with friends, even in bed. The muscles have gotten so accustomed to this position it has become their norm. So there's a good chance that most of you out there have the same debilitating hunched over shoulders and don't even know it! I'm going to take a few posts to break down the parts of the shoulder - even your breathing and confidence can be affected - so we will all know the intricacies of the shoulder region and how to move with care.

When you hear something from two different people within twelve hours, the universe has spoken to you and you must share!

"I believe in pink. I believe that laughing is the best calorie burner. I believe in kissing, kissing a lot. I believe in being strong when everything seems to be going wrong. I believe that happy girls are the prettiest girls. I believe that tomorrow is another day and I believe in miracles."
- Audrey Hepburn

In case you need a little more than pink as a reason to believe, take this recent study done by Women's Health Initiative researchers: 205 women with hot flashes were randomized to either a placebo pill or the antidepressant escitalopram. Those on escitalopram experienced a 47% decrease in hot flashes, and those on placebo experienced a 33% decrease in symptoms. Looks like just expecting the best will help you more than you think!

Today I spent nearly an hour sitting in the waiting room of the General Oncology/Hematology floor at Seattle Cancer Care Alliance. I was eavesdropping (surprise, surprise) on the couple closest to me. Their oldest daughter just got married. Their youngest daughter was an infant when the man was diagnosed with cancer. He's been cancer-free for five years. Five years is a clear triumph when it comes to cancer, but a blink of an eye with children and milestones.

Today we can all be grateful that either we are not going through that, or that we have the strength to triumph.

Once upon a time someone told me life was a veil of tears. This is absolutely a glass half-empty approach, if you ask me, but at the same time it is impossible to ignore the fact that tragedy abounds. There are a million bazillion ways to ache. And all too often it seems that people get stuck in the moment and can't get out of it. We need strength to persevere and flexibility to be open to something new. This is 100% relevant for both physical and mental pain.

You might have done things the way you were doing them before because they were working for you. Now - you hurt. Your body has reacted in this way to send you the message that these things no longer work for you. Modern western medicine will tell you that you can just take a pill. I would like to take it a step even more modern and challenge you to examine your own body and mind and to see where you are strong, where you are flexible, and where you need to let go. Steve Jobs has constantly been lauded for his intuitive recognition of the ability to individualize and customize technology. Your own health is the same! Explore your options and pick and choose what works for you.

  That's you!

I've been trying to eat healthy since sometime in middle school (before that I considered a full day of Captain Crunch and Peanut Butter 'n' Chocolate ice cream to be a perfectly acceptable diet).

My successes in this department were primarily limited to: deli turkey out of the bag, carrots and hummus, and microwavable cheese and broccoli packages. Low carbs and low effort! Cheers! Particularly because I needed another food group.

Salads... so many ingredients, all that bland lettuce, never really been my thing. California Pizza Kitchen can do a pretty good job with them, and the packaged ones at Trader Joe's get the job done too. But in my house? You want me to plan ahead, buy several different veggies and proteins, wash them, cut them up, and then be disappointed by how green my meal tastes and polish it off with ice cream? I'll get back to you tomorrow. Fortunately, the universe taught me how to make a salad and I didn't even know it was coming. I signed up for the local farmer's boxes last March, and received a $34 box of produce every week since then. A lot of the time I ended up with extra stuff I couldn't get to, or I was baffled about what to do with it (cabbage? a little bit on fish tacos would be alright but again, back to the planning issue), or intimidated (fennel is supposed to taste like black licorice!! I hate black licorice!! And it's so big!!) so things got tossed unused. Over time I warmed up to the adventure, and through conversation was given suggestions for how to use some of these strange exotic plants like parsley. As I began to realize that most of them were, in fact, not strange or exotic, it became easier to throw a little bit of each on top of my lettuce (organic lettuce and Safeway lettuce are two entirely different foods) ... and it didn't taste so bad. Today I realized I had done this, oh, maybe 3 times, but that that is enough times to be a girl-who-makes-salad. But it didn't happen naturally or overnight. I had to jump into the deep end of the produce world without my water wings and touch a lot of moldy veggies on the way.

Ok, I am totally stealing this line from someone else's article, but for now that will be ok because I have no shame in paying homage to those that are wiser and more well-spoken than me! Before I give away the line, the background, and original thinking on my part, comes from some inspiration and practice I did awhile ago. A very classical piece of information, something I read questioned me about what I would do if only I were not afraid. Something in me rose to the challenge that day, so I puffed up my chest feathers and decided that the one thing in my life that eluded me on fear alone (well, mostly. There might be some other things involved, like not practicing) was handstand in yoga class. I know in my heart of hearts that I am capable of doing that. Have I wanted it bad enough? Nope definitely not. I am 85% not comfortable with the idea of my strong hips and thighs balancing on my weeny little shoulders. That was a euphemism for being afraid of falling on my head and spine when the aforementioned equation goes oh-so-me-squawking-out-loud wrong.

Low and behold!

I decided to try out my newfound courage with headstand in the middle of the room at my next yoga class. I pushed higher and further than I normally like to and you know what happened - I flopped over the top, not even a little bit gracefully, and landed right on my sacrum in the middle of the very hard wood floor. It was loud and embarassing, not to mention it hurt quite a bit, which I lied about when asked if I was ok, and I had quite some difficulty walking for the next 24 hours. My immediate reaction to this valiant act was that it didn't do me any good and that it was awfully dumb because I still couldn't do freestanding headstand, let alone handstand, and now my butt hurt. Optimism stepped in and told me there was a silver lining to this, so I kept thinking about it. The only thing I could come up with was that at least now I knew what the other side was like - I now know what it's like to fall, and what it feels like when you've gone too far. How would I ever know how to find the sweet spot unless I knew exactly what it feels like on the other side? Just now I read some confirmation of this (the line I have stolen!) - if you can't go forward enough to risk falling, you won't go forward enough to balance.


And as my friends and I often reference, a fine balance is the sweet spot of life. If you have dainty enough toes to stay there.

I’ve successfully managed to live on cruise control for two weeks…not sure how long it will last, but for now I’m enjoying my hands-free lifestyle. Which has also given me the opportunity to reflect on all the crap that happened this year. And it was just crap, no giant Tragedies.
And now all I have are lessons, optimism, and strength. The hurt and frustration subsided, and I actually like myself better. I said, hey self, that really wasn’t so bad, you did it, and now you’re wiser and cooler! You’re more independent, patient, learning to roll with the punches, better at empathizing, more even-tempered, better at standing up for yourself, and much less selfish. Then I thought, Yikes! Could I even imagine going back to the person I was 6 months ago? That person sounds terribly immature and annoying! Good thing I had all those nasty lessons so I don’t have to be that person anymore. The human mind is the only machine where more miles per year is a good thing.

Notice that everyone can't swim and/or likes to swim in their clothing...oh China.

Listening - is it my greatest weakness, or my greatest strength? Do I prefer friends who are great listeners, and let me be the selfish one, or is it better to have friends who like to talk, letting me be the listener, the needed one, the support? Obviously it is good to have all of the above situations! However the thing with listening is that it's always changing, shifting, but always feeling great. There's nothing I love more than getting a note from a friend thanking me for listening to them. On the other side, I can't thank my friends enough for listening to me babble about whatever the heck I feel like, and let me tell you, it's not always important!

I recognize that the things I just wrote aren't exactly a new revelation, so let's cut to the chase. I read recently in a psychology paper from here or there, you find a lot of new things on the internet when you don't have a lot to do at work, that said that in a conversation, the listener is actually the one in control, and the speaker is developing emotional dependency on the listener. The other piece of my revelation is that while going through some stressors recently, I found that two of my best listeners were people who really shouldn't have taken that role. I would prefer not to point them out, since all of my friends are created equal (wink), but I'm going to, just to demonstrate the unexpectedness of this. The first is my boss. She's not that much older than me, so a friendship isn't that unlikely, but the fact that we managed to cross some boundaries and still maintain a healthy working relationship was really amazing. The second was my ex-boyfriend's sister. I was literally putting her between a rock and a hard place. She held up like a champ (obviously plays by rule #76). Now that I'm feeling better and don't need to tearfully ramble at painful lengths of time, I look back at them with so much appreciation and respect. Maybe no one knew exactly what was going on, but just by letting me talk, we developed friendships that are invaluable to me, and in semi-inappropriate places! I also appreciate that none of us needed to live our lives in black and white, we were open to see how things would unfold for us.

Attitude and self-esteem should never, ever, be based on your circumstances. It should be vice versa. I'm pretty sure that's called enlightenment or something, so chances are none of us will ever make it to the far side of the spectrum. But perspective checks are constantly necessary in life. I find it very easy to feel good or bad based on what's happening in my life. The thing I discovered is that "what's happening in my life" is constantly changing whether I like or want the changes, so letting my attitude and self-esteem correlate with these events doesn't do a damn thing besides stress me out. The other disadvantage to all of this is that people don't like your more or less based on your circumstances; rather they either sympathetic or envious. Which are fine emotions, but they're not friendship-building emotions. Your attitude and confidence will bring in a lot more good things from the outside than great hair or a respectable job.

I think Lao Tzu said it better than me, "Rejoice in the way things are."

This is me, for better or for worse!

What happens when you lose your job, you move, you have finals for online psychology, several family holidays, and are trying to maintain your sanity, your yoga practice, and all your friendships? And as a result of all this, you've decided you're going to forego the cable/internet bill until the cash flow stabilizes (hey, it's summer, I should be outside anyway, not boob tubing it). Your blog gets the shaft! So I guess it's to be expected, I do rank low on blog consistency! Like I said before - it's a pretty accurate reflection of my life. The moving is done, the psych class is done, family celebrations are on hiatus for a few months, leaving only one major problem. The sanity is slow creeping back. This leads back to my favorite yoga metaphor of all time:
Last fall is when I began yoga, and I wanted to do a headstand in the middle of the room SO BADLY. I knew I was capable of it, so I decided to make it my goal to land it by the end of 2010. Then, like always, life got in the way, I got really sick for 2-3 weeks, I had a Biostatistics final (that one was much more painful than the psych class) and the headstand (hmm kinda like my blog, I'm seeing a pattern here) was all but forgotten. I did a yoga workshop on New Year's Day, and lo and behold! I landed the headstand in the middle of the room! And I hadn't even really tried. I was ecstatically telling my yoga teacher this story, and she reminded me that that is the beauty of yoga: sometimes you let go and things just happen. With everything that I've been trying to sort out lately, I can promise you this is true. Stress is just the devil.

Grace is one of my favorite things. [A side note is that one time I wikipedia'ed it, and the whole definition was related to the Christian God. My contemporary cultural definition is acting with poise and confidence, accepting failure with good nature, and making careful choices when integrating emotion and action.]

A while ago I applied for summer program that takes students to New Mexico and Ensenada to study border epidemiology. I didn't get accepted, and was pretty bummed.

In conversation with the woman to whom I turned in my application, I casually mentioned something about my bachelor's degree, something that happens to be uncommon for my workplace. She knew of a group here at my work where that thing is particularly relevant and sought-after, and has now introduced me to some people there. Now when I am in need of a job. Although I have nothing concrete, it is certainly a hopeful situation. This hopeful situation would never have arisen if I had not applied to the earlier program for which I was rejected. As disappointing as it was, now I see it as nothing but an enormous gift! It is such a good reminder for me to always remember to take things in strides, and wait out situations. You never know what will turn around into your favor (and vice versa... wink).

For icing on the cake, I brought this woman a small thank you gift this morning, and she was thrilled. She also told me what lovely things my hopeful future employers were saying about me.

None of this would ever have happened if I had not worked hard for something and been let down.

So are you going to be this -


or this -

The other weekend I went hiking with a friend and when we got to the waterfall, we started taking pictures, like any self-respecting girl who lives in the northwest would do. My friend climbed on a big rock, you can sort of see it in the left of the photo (and you can laugh at me and tell me it's not that big, it's all relative, right) and she wanted to take pictures there. Then she wanted me to climb on it too. I'm not so great with balance, and I had just rolled my ankle, and I was enjoying the waterfall just dandy from the little rocks closer to the ground. So I opted not go up. It turned out to be a great moment of self. In the past, I might have beat myself up for not being cool enough to climb on the big rock. Or I would have pushed myself to do it and been miserable the whole time I was up there. This time I thought, who cares! She can call me a weiner if she wants. I'm happy with the way things are, so I don't need any validation from others. And I'm even ok taking the dis.

I will note that there are times when peer pressure is good. There are definitely times when I'm wanting to climb on that rock, I just need a little support. The best thing to do is take an internal double-check and determine if you really want the thing you're going after, or if you want people to think you can handle it. The former determines the latter.

One of my friends has a blog I particularly admire because she has a theme, sticks with it, and posts on a regular basis. This situation somehow continues to elude me, even kept me from blogging for awhile because I had failed so miserably at the consistency part. Another friend told me it didn't matter at all if I had that, it was still interesting to read what was written. So, in giving this another go, I realized that although my blog is doing whatever it feels like, it's a very accurate and real representation of my life. Things change - I get busy, I get bored, my perspective changes, I'm influenced by the various people around me, I have different goals. I also realized that this is what gives it character. I was reading Shape magazine on Saturday, whom I used to respect, and saw a tidbit that suggested putting on your favorite CD when you're in a bad mood to make yourself feel better. Zzzzzzzz. Personally, I want something fresh! [Although I do like quotes and Chinese proverbs, definitely not so fresh.] I like the idea that if I write what I want, when I want, and how I want, it might be something people can really relate to. And in this media and advertising driven world, that's definitely something we could use.

Do you know why Friday the 13th is unlucky? Neither did I, until my barista decided to give me more than just a dynamite Americano. In 1307, some king in some European monarchy rounded up all the templars and killed them. Apparently they were too threatening. Lesson learned? Even kings are cowards when they feel threatened. Remember that you're better than that.

On the eve of being laid off, something I thought would never happen to me, after all the elbow grease I put into getting mostly A's in college, I'd like to talk about loss. Not the kind where you lose a parent and nothing can replace what you had, but the kind where things have changed and it looks like it's going to take a miracle to get them back to where they were. This is brought to light today because as I went the various stages of feeling pretty rotten, and then not-so-rotten, I realized how I really felt.

I've had two relationships as an adult, and irrelevant of the fact that they were both on completely different levels in almost every respect, the break-ups triggered drastically different types of sadness for me. The first relationship was great while it lasted. But whenever I looked ahead at myself at 30, 40, etc., with this person, the image just got all jumbled and watercolor-like. I always knew it wouldn't get that far, so I also knew the break-up was inevitable. When it ended, it was deeply saddening because I enjoyed spending time with this person, I considered this person a good friend, and I was sad to think all the good times were going to be just memories, instead of memories-in-the-making also. Additionally, I was scared of the unknown. What comes next? Being alone after being in a relationship is miserable (being alone after months of being alone, well, that just becomes life). As sad I was, I knew I would eventually be happier elsewhere. The second break-up was totally different. There are still the same feelings of sadness over not getting to make new memories and being afraid of the next step, but there is also that overwhelming urge to cling to every last chance because this was a shoe that fits. And I've got some pretty weird feet, so when it fits, it feels oh-so-good. It feels impossible to give up on, and even the memory of what you had is so much sweeter than anything new and right in front of you.

The point is, losing something sucks. No way around that. However, if you can suss out exactly what is going on, you can handle it with the grace and maturity of someone too good to have that thing anyway (FTR: this is not me). So when I was let go today, I was pretty upset at first. I'm supposed to be moving soon, I have mountains of debt, I was planning on going back to school, NOW WHAT? Then as the minutes ticked, and the world was clearly not going to stop spinning just because I needed a break, I remembered I didn't actually like the work I did. I was never proud of my job. I will always be proud of where I work, who I work with, what we're working on - but as for the stuff I show up to do every day, I'm going to give it a big fat sayonara in September and welcome the next guest in.

[Note: Because I both need a job and like to defend my own self-worth, here are the facts about the lay-off: Our study budge was reduced by 50% per NIH. My unit let go of five people over the last few months before me, so when all is said and done, that's quite a compliment. There are only five people left in my unit, so they meant business when they decided to trim the fat.]

Fremont is NOT the Center of the Universe

This morning I was listening to the radio - I'd prefer not to name the DJ because I'm totally against burning bridges, but it was middle-of-the-road in terms of depth - and it was proposed that the Royal Honeymooner's might be in Jordan.

"You might not think of Jordan as being a honeymoon spot, but there's some really cool things out there in the middle of nowhere."

"They have this place, I think it's called Petra, it's like giant buildings carved out of rocks. I heard it's really cool."

"If he's taking his new bride to an archaeological dig, that won't bode well for the marriage."

Text from a caller: "If you want to get raped by a Muslim" [This quote I forget exactly, but raped and Muslim were definitely part of it.]



DID YOU KNOW...

Petra is one of the seven wonders of the world.

Indiana Jones was filmed there.

Jordan is not a violent country, in fact, it's very safe (Just like anywhere, there are good parts and bad parts. I wouldn't walk alone outside of my own house when it's dark, and you shouldn't do that in Jordan either).

The Queen of Jordan, Queen Rania, is so hot she'll knock your socks off. Oh yeah, she loves kids and philanthropy too.

There are a number of high-end spa resorts on the Dead Sea, where you can swim and float because of its salt content.

Sometimes it's important to remember that there are a lot of special, important things going on outside of your world. Just the same as its preposterous to think our neighbs in Fremont are the center of the universe, it's preposterous to think that your values and beliefs are all there is. Take some time, ask some questions, and maybe you'll meet Indiana Jones and a superhot Queen. And maybe you'll like them too.